We live in a world where we are constantly being reminded of small actions we can take to make a difference. But how do we raise young people to take BIG actions and truly work to make change?
Today I was so excited to learn that an 18 year old (RP) who has worked for me for 5 years is being awarded a Youth Community Service Award. An annual award that is given to two teenagers a year. Some for donating time, helping others and other feel good actions. But RP earned her award for having written and received two grants (for a total of just under $20,000.00) for the city; planning and running events for teens in the community; running a completely youth lead community change project for two years and volunteering at positive youth development programs when ever she was needed.
Two weeks ago I was invited to sit in on a meeting with another teenager as she sat and told her principal that the school was not welcoming new students(transfers) well enough. She continued to present a plan of how she would start a welcoming committee, host a few events and create a space for new kids to meet up for lunch and that all she needed from the school was a list of names before the summer was over. WOW. I love it! She had it all thought out, could answer any question and made it impossible for them to say no.
So where does this internal drive to make change, to take initiative come from? And how do we support it and not squash it. The answer is: US. And here are a few tips for you as parents, providers and caregivers:
- Teach children to question authority appropriately. From a young age be willing to let children question rules and have a conversation about them. In our programs I tell young people "You can always ask me why, as long as you do it appropriately. That means in a normal voice, without attitude and with an open mind..." We also tell them that 90% of rules are for safety and 10% for respect.
- Allow young people to process the reason. "So Dad, I can't climb on the roof because I could get hurt if I fell but I can climb the tree in the back yard?" Why? Be ready! They'll catch you every time. It is OK as a parent or provider to say, "I am not sure how to explain why, it just doesn't feel the same. Let me think about it and I will try to figure out how to explain the difference".
- Encourage your child to see what you do to help others; donations, community service, political action... but remember that they are not you and they may have a different idea of how to get involved.
- When you see your child interested in a topic, something on the news, that they hear people talking about or that they see... ask them "What do you think we could do about that?" or take a moment to explain two different points of view and ask which they agree with more?
- Look for programs like Destination Imagination or other Creative Problem Solving programs to give children the tools to think out of the box... and be supported doing it!
- Destination Imagination (DI) is awesome! It is a competitive problem solving team tournament that has 5 different types of challenges at all age levels and requires adults to BUTT OUT.
